Emotional Intelligence for Casino Workers

George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CEAP
CEO, Anderson & Anderson
Fellow, American Orthopsychiatric Association
Diplomate, American Association of Anger Management Providers

http://www.andersonservices.com

 Emotional Intelligence for Casino Workers

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is the capacity to create positive outcomes for ourselves and others. Being emotionally intelligent means being aware of, understanding, and appropriately expressing/handling emotions—one’s own and those of others.  EQ is the ability to build people up, bring them together, and motivate them to do their best. 

Whereas IQ, a measurement of one’s capacity to master precision learning, is static over time, EQ is a skill that can be developed and/or enhanced at any point in our lives. And although IQ does not predict success in work or life, study after study has shown a strong correlation between EQ and a person’s success in both work and interpersonal relationships.  Therefore, emotional intelligence is an important skill to acquire. 

Most, if not all, jobs in the Gaming Industry are extremely stressful and require great amounts of human interaction—with customers and other employees. When employees in customer-service based positions demonstrate a lack of emotional intelligence, it reflects poorly on the organization, and reduces customer satisfaction.  Therefore, it is in the best interest of gaming organizations to take steps to proactively provide training and staff development in managing anger, managing stress, improving communication skills, and enhancing emotional intelligence.

Just as laughter serves as an indicator of emotional intelligence at work, rampant anger, fear, apathy, or sullen silence signal the opposite. In a survey of more than a thousand U.S. workers, 42 percent reported incidences of yelling and other kinds of verbal abuse in their workplaces, and almost 30 percent admitted to having yelled at a co-worker themselves. Such disturbing encounters wreak havoc emotionally, as demonstrated by studies in which physiological responses were monitored during arguments. Verbal attacks send painful emotional messages of disgust or contempt, emotionally hijacking the recipient, particularly when the attack comes from a boss or spouse whose opinion carries a lot of weight.

Often, people think of anger management as being exclusively for individuals mandated by courts, Human Resource Managers, Employee Assistance Programs, or ultimatum-issuing spouses.  Once enrolled in classes, however, people quickly recognize the value of using these skills in all aspects of daily functioning.

Before beginning a structured anger management program, every client should complete a computer-scored Anger Management Map. This assessment determines his or her level of functioning in the following areas: anger management, stress management, emotional intelligence, and communications.

Emotional intelligence is by far the most popular of the aforementioned modules. It is closely related to empathy, sensitivity to others, compassion, and self awareness. It is what distinguishes persons who make you feel comfortable, optimistic, laugh, and feel good about yourself from those who you avoid due to contagious negativism that causes you to feel gloom and discomfort. For customer-service workers, such as Casino workers, it is especially important to not radiate pessimism; glum people simply don’t gamble as much as those who are cheerful.    

Surprisingly, in the United States, Canada, England and Bermuda, the largest number of referrals to anger management programs that use the emotional intelligence model come from businesses and governmental agencies. These organizations tend to be most concerned with the bottom line, productivity, profit, and good morale. Understanding the powerful role of emotions in the workplace sets the best leaders apart from the rest, with noticeable differences in results and the retention of talent, as well as all-important intangibles, such as morale, motivation, and commitment. Effective anger management classes reduce staff turnover, sick day usage, interpersonal conflict, and low morale. As stated previously, the morale in a casino is practically proportional to its productivity and profit.

Here are some case studies that illustrate the positive effects of anger management.

Several months ago a young father joined one of our Saturday accelerated classes, because he was concerned over his growing impatience with, and negative response to, his infant son. During his first session, he quickly realized that this “impatience” was also occurring at his business, where he was responsible for managing fifty employees. He also acknowledged being frequently abrasive in interactions with his wife. Over a ten session period, as he began making changes in his sensitivity to others.  He increased his use of assertive communication, rather than passive-aggressive or aggressive communication and was able to see constructive changes in his relationships with others, as well as in his self-esteem.

In another example, an executive of a major motion picture company was ordered to attend an executive coaching/anger management class after verbally abusing a member of his senior staff during a meeting. Initially, this executive denied the need for help and protested his referral to an anger management program. An initial assessment interview revealed his style of communication was aggressive, his level of stress was high, his emotional intelligence was low, and finally, his skills in managing anger were poor. In short, there was a lot of room for improvement in all four areas covered by our curriculum.  During his ten week individual coaching sessions, he was promoted at his company and received a hefty raise. After one year, he is now an advocate for education in emotional intelligence for all managers and supervisors in his company.

Forty percent of our referrals come from business and industry. Self-referrals are the third largest source of referrals to our classes. Many of our new referrals come from participants who have successfully completed either executive coaching or anger management classes. Thirty percent of anger management referrals come from the criminal justice system which includes the courts, probation and parole.

In our third example, a man decided to take his toddler son for a ride on his Harley Davidson motorcycle. A neighbor reported the incident to the police, and the man was subsequently arrested and charged with child endangerment. As a result of this offense, he was ordered to attend a one year anger management class with a focus of emotional intelligence. After attending the required number of classes, the man thanked the Judge who sentenced him. He also called his local Adult Education High School and recommended that it offer anger management and emotional intelligence education to the community as a public service.

These three rather disparate examples show that anger management education is appropriate for everyone, and it can positively affect a client’s life.  

Emotional intelligence is a relatively new concept that holds considerable promise in teaching us the skills to better relate to each other.  Improving relations leads to positive outcomes in many areas of human interaction. Human interaction is a necessary aspect of any job in the gaming industry.  Therefore, in short, developing and employing emotional intelligence skills can be both financially and emotionally beneficial to casino employees.

“Me To” Marketing Does Not Work

  

As I approach my 32nd. year as a successful small business operator, I have found one marketing strategy which doe not work. “Me To Marketing” takes the easy route of simply claiming to do whatever the industry leaders or what everyone else does. It does not distinguish your services or products from others and therefore, it does not offer any reason for clients to do business with you.

 According to Marcia Yudkin, The Marketing Minute, at
http://www.marketingformore.com: “When I was probing a client on what made his business special, he replied, “Actually, I’m just like everyone else. What’s wrong with that? I’ll just be another burger place.”

But with a “me to” presentation and no distinctiveness, your firm becomes harder to remember, harder to recommend and difficult to market in a focused way. Why create such challenges deliberately?” The success of the Anderson & Anderson anger management/executive coaching model is in part, related to its uniqueness. This model is a class, which teaches skills in recognizing and managing anger, stress, assertive communication and enhancing emotional intelligence. It includes an assessment at intake and a post test when the class is completed. 

Our “me to” competitors claim to do every thing which we do without any hint of anything special or different. This approach has little appeal to potential clients.

 

Yudkin advises: “Instead, select something appealing for customers around which to create your identity. Possibilities are endless.”

  

George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CAMF, CEAP

www.andersonservices.com

www.aaamp.org

www.anger-management-resources.org

   

Anger Is All The Rage

By George WillDuring the divisive War of 1812, a livid woman famous for her long hair rode to the White House, stood in her carriage, let down her tresses and proclaimed that she would gladly be shorn of them if they would be used to hang President James Madison. That anecdote, from Catherine Allgor’s biography of Dolley Madison, shows that today’s theatrical anger is not without precedent. But now there is a new style in anger — fury as a fashion accessory, indignation as evidence of good character.Under the headline “San Franciscans Hurl Their Rage at Parking Patrol,” the New York Times recently described the verbal abuse and physical violence — there were 28 attacks in 2006 — inflicted on parking enforcement officers in a city that has a surplus of liberalism and a shortage of parking places. Parking is so difficult that George Anderson, a mental health expert, has stopped holding lectures there because his audiences arrive seething about their parking frustrations. Anderson represents the American Association of Anger Management Providers. Of course. San Francisco, a showcase for expressive individualism, is full of people bristling with rights and eager to rebel against oppressive authority, but having a hard time finding any. The only rules concern parking.No wonder Americans are infatuated with anger: It is democratic. Anyone can express it, and it is one of the seven deadly sins, which means it is a universal susceptibility. So in this age that is proud of having achieved “the repeal of reticence,” anger exhibitionism is pandemic.There are the tantrums — sometimes both theatrical and perfunctory — of talking heads on television or commentators writing in vitriol (Paul Krugman’s incessant contempt, Ann Coulter’s equally constant loathing). There is road rage (and parking lot rage when the Whole Foods Market parking lot is congested with expressive individualists driving Volvos and Priuses). The blogosphere often is, as one blogger joyfully says, “an electronic primal scream.” And everywhere there is the histrionic fury of ordinary people venting in everyday conversations.Many people who loathe George W. Bush have adopted what Peter Wood describes as “ecstatic anger as a mode of political action.” Anger often is, Wood says, “a spectacle to be witnessed by an appreciative audience, not an attempt to win over the uncommitted.”Wood, an anthropologist and author of “A Bee in the Mouth: Anger in America Now,” says the new anger “often has the look-at-me character of performance art.” His book is a convincing, hence depressing, explanation of “anger chic” — of why anger has become an all-purpose emotional stance. It has achieved prestige and become “a credential for group membership.” As a result, “Americans have been flattening their emotional range into an angry monotone.”Wood notes that there is a “vagueness and elasticity of the grievances” that supposedly justify today’s almost exuberant anger. And anger is more pervasive than merely political grievances would explain. Today’s anger is a coping device for everyday life. It also is the defining attribute of an increasingly common personality type: the person who “unless he is angry, feels he is nothing at all.”That type, infatuated with anger, uses it to express identity. Anger as an expression of selfhood is its own vindication. Wood argues, however, that as anger becomes a gas polluting the social atmosphere, it becomes not a sign of personal uniqueness but of a herd impulse.Once upon a time, Americans admired models of self-control, people such as George Washington and Jackie Robinson, who mastered their anger rather than relishing being mastered by it. America’s fictional heroes could be angry, but theirs was a reluctant anger — Alan Ladd as the gunfighter in “Shane,” Gary Cooper as the marshal in “High Noon.” Today, however, proclaimed anger — the more vituperative the better — is regarded as a sign of good character and emotional vitality.Perhaps this should not be surprising, now that Americans are inclined to elect presidents who advertise their emotions — “I feel your pain.” As the late Mary McGrory wrote, Bill Clinton “is a child of his age; he believes more in the thrust-out lower lip than the stiff upper one.”The politics of disdain — e.g., Howard Dean’s judgment that Republicans are “brain dead” and “a lot of them never made an honest living in their lives” — derails politics by defining opponents as beyond the reach of reason. The anger directed at Bush today, like that directed at Clinton during his presidency, luxuriates in its own vehemence.Today, many people preen about their anger as a badge of authenticity: I snarl, therefore I am. Such people make one’s blood boil.georgewill@washpost.com  

The Beauty of Emotional Intelligence

  

The Anderson & Anderson anger management/executive coaching curriculum teaches skill enhancement in the following four areas: anger management, stress management, communication, and emotional intelligence. Each of these holds significant importance, as they are the keys to improving the nature of interactions between people. However, the one that seems to be the most important to master is emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence (also known as E.Q.) involves the ability to empathize with the person with whom you are having a conflict. Your empathy causes you to behave in a manner that is likely to decrease the level of stress and anger that has initially erupted on the part of the other party. It is also likely to change the method of communication that exists within that exchange at that moment. In other words, both you and the other individual are likely to be more assertive towards one another, and less aggressive.

 

The beauty of emotional intelligence is that it can also be used to prevent conflict and increase interpersonal relationships. When you make a mistake that causes stress within another individual, that person is likely to confront you on the matter. Regardless of how the individual confronts you, it is very important to assess the situation and respond in such a manner that the likely outcome is positive. A while back, a nervous police officer confronted a gentleman with a speed scanner. The officer nervously explained why he pulled the gentleman over. The gentleman could sense that the officer was extremely jittery. The gentleman explained to the officer that he did not realize how fast he was going, but that he understands why he was pulled over. He also told the officer that “he deserved whatever was coming to him”. The officer, relieved, asked the gentleman to be careful and let him off with a warning.

 

The gentleman above used emotional intelligence to avoid increasing the stress level of the officer, which more than likely would have led to a very annoying fine. Whatever the situation, it is always best to put aside fight-or-flight tendencies and search for the positive way out of a negative situation. The Anderson & Anderson anger management curriculum teaches skills in improving your emotional intelligence. Whether your emotional intelligence needs improving or is completely impaired, the Anderson & Anderson curriculum will help you master the skills needed in this area.

 

Rasheed Ahmed

Anderson & Anderson

Anger Management Services

310-207-3591

http://www.andersonservices.com/resources

www.aaamp.org

www.anger-management-resources.org

 

Four Points for Respectful Communication and E.Q.

  • You have the right to say what you want to say, but you cannot do it in a abusive way, using bullying or harsh language.
  • In order for communication to be effective, both parties must listen sensitivly to what the other person is saying and not try to merely convince the other party of the merits of your position.
  • Good communication requires negotiation and compromise. If somebody has to win th argument thent somebody else has to lose it, and you’ve lost good, healthy communication.
  • No single issue is as important as your overall goal of remainng assestive and non-aggressive and direct in your relationhips with others.

Healthy communication involves two essential skills: Speaking & Listening. George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CAMF, CEAP

Open Letter to Judges & Prosecuting Attorneys

Judges and Prosecuting Attorneys need to be aware of a new scheme being perpetrated on the Internet by unscrupulous “so called anger management counselors”. Unfortunately, there are no state mandated standards anywhere for this new area of specialization. Consequently, the internet is being flooded with ads for cheap, fast, accepted, approved, money back guaranteed on-line anger management classes.

Currently, there is one reliable Facilitator Certification Organization and one recognized Anger Management Provider Association. Therefore, in the absence of verifiable training, experience and curricula, none of these on-line classes should be accepted.

Visit the two sites listed below for a national list of providers who  are trained to offer live anger management/executive coaching classes using the Conover Anger Management Assessment and the Anderson & Anderson Anger Management Curriculum. The websites are http://www.andersonservices.com/providers.html and www.anger-management-resources.org.

George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CAMF, CEAP
Diplomate, American Association of
Anger Management Providers
http://www.andersonservices.com/
http://www.angertrends.blogspot.com/

http://www.linkedin.com/in/coachinganger

www.anger-management-resources.org

Negative Parental Examples and the Values They Communicate

Parental Example                                Value Communicated

  • Adult lying                                  Adults cannot be trusted
  • Aggressive communication          The world in unsafe
  • Child neglect                               Children are not valued
  • Constant family fighting                Life is not joyful
  • Constant emotional problems       Life is an emotional roller coaster
  • Lack of parental integrity             Honesty & respect nor valued
  • Parental depression                     Doubt and negativity are the norm

Adults who have problems managing anger are often victims of other emotions which may leave them impaired in their ability to parent.

George Anderson, MSW, BCD

www.andersonservices.com

www.anger-managemetn-resources.org

www.aaamp.org